Reviews for Michael Robert

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Prologue: Bo

Two Years Ago

“I got accepted,” Jamie said, catching me off guard with his sudden announcement. My small boat glided across the river while we headed to the shack after selling our latest catch in town. The day’s fishing had been epic. What came after, not so much.

I was aware that he’d applied to colleges but secretly hoped he wouldn’t be accepted. The wish was a shitty one considering I was in love with him. I turned toward him as he steered the boat, using the engine tiller as a rudder. He looked tired after a long day of fishing and checking lobster pots.

I crouched so as not to block his view and scooted to the bench seat, sitting beside him and reaching for the handle he held while he guided us to what I considered our home. “It’s my turn,” I said, tapping his hand. He made way and I took over, but he remained by my side. “When were you going to tell me?” I asked, forcing myself to look at him while keeping my emotions in check. I was terrified of losing Jamie.

He looked away and toward the shoreline. I knew he didn’t want to have this conversation but he owed me an honest answer. “I’m telling you now, ain’t I?” he groused.

“What am I gonna do without you?” I asked, biting the inside of my cheek so I wouldn’t tear up. “You said we’d be together at the shack forever, J.”

Jamie didn’t handle difficult talks well. In fact, he preferred avoiding them at all costs. But this time he found his voice and it was surprisingly strong. “Damn it, Bo! I can’t just tell my folks I ain’t gonna listen to them about making future plans and shit.”

The words stung. “What about our plans though?” I asked, being careful not to lock eyes with the boy I’d worshiped since sixth grade.

“I’ll be back every summer,” he defended. “It’ll go by fast, you’ll see.”

“What about our fishin’ business and fixing up the shack?” I asked. “We had future plans too, remember?”

“We ain’t got the money, Bo. How’s that shit gonna happen without money?”

He was right, we were broke, but we had each other and that made us wealthy in my eyes. We rode the final two miles across smooth water in silence, neither wanting to admit our childhood fantasies had been replaced by adult realities. I loved him and I hoped Jamie loved me. He swore that he loved me even if he couldn’t say the words out loud. We even did a blood pact in eighth grade, pressing our thumbs together in solidarity. He was mine according to his pledge. I knew I was his.

He jumped out of the boat and tethered us to the dock. I remained in the boat, looking up at him, cracking into a million tiny pieces.

“Take me with you,” I pleaded.

He stood above me on the dock, cupping his hand over his eyes so he could see me. I knew I sounded pathetic and hoped I didn’t look it. “How am I supposed to do that, Bo? I won’t have a job and you’ve got all this here,” Jamie argued, gesturing toward the fishing shack. “What will I have for my future?”

“But I told you I’ll share everything with you. One day I’ll own this and you’ll have half,” I reminded him. “You promised me.” Tears fell from my eyes despite my best efforts. I hated appearing weak in front of him, but I loved Jamie and the thought of him leaving without me was too much to bear.

“We’re kids, Bo. We’re barely out of high school,” he pointed out. “Did you actually think we’d be getting hitched one day?”

His question stabbed my heart. A wave of sickening understanding passed over me. “You didn’t?” I asked.

There’s always a big event or uncomfortable truth that happens to a kid when they cross over to adulthood. Life decides it’s time you faced some hard facts for some cold reason. All the years you wasted wishing you were older can be regretted when you get there. Wishing to drive. Wishing to be eighteen. Wishing to be legal so you can drink. We wish all those innocent years away, and for what?

“Bo, you know we can’t get married, don’t you?” Jamie asked. “This is the fuckin’ south, in case you forgot.”

A lie seemed appropriate after his comment. “Maybe,” I whispered. I lifted my face to him even though I knew my cheeks were covered in tears. “But I woulda done everything I could to take you with me if things were reversed, Jamie. I know that for sure.”